Thank you for all your kudos and comments on the duathlon. I think I was feeling pretty negative about it for a number of reasons. First and foremost was that I just didn't expect it to be so hard. I mean, I've done those distances before. I had done some practice workouts in the weekends leading up to it that didn't suck so badly. I really thought it would just be a fun time. And it was a real hit to the ego to be suffering pretty early on. Yes, the conditions were less than ideal, but I really don't think that was what did me in. I think if it had been as hot as the weather we'd been having, I would have suffered much more.
Don't get me wrong, I never doubted finishing - but I was hurting a lot more than I thought I should be. I've tried breaking it down a bit, but the only thing I can think of was that I pushed my pace more than I do during training because I didn't want to be DFL (though I was close). Coming off the bike was brutal so I definitely need to do some more hard bike rides followed by some running. I know I've been slacking on my swimming so I will need to amp that up too (which is just really a side note - not related to the du).
My ego hit has also made me start doubting the idea of finishing an Oly this year. Before the race, I was like "I've swam 1500 m before - no biggie" and "I've biked 18-19 miles before without feeling like it was that hard - could surely add 5-7 more" and "I've jogged/walked 8.4 mi before - 6.2 shouldn't be that bad". But what became absolutely apparent on Saturday is that putting it all together will be a super challenge. Yes, I can train harder and get to the point where I can finish. But what am I going to do with my training to really "get there"? And can I stomach being last again? It is really demoralizing to me. That said, I'm still thinking about it. The two front runners (though if I got to the point where I really felt I could, I might try both) are the Lake St. Louis tri on 8/25 and the Redman OKC tri on 9/23 (part of Club Championships so tri club would partially sponsor my travel). But am I crazy to aim this high? Both races also offer sprints.
Regardless, I'm signed up for the Pewaukee sprint the weekend after the 4th of July (and my kids are doing their races again). And I'll likely redo the Show Me Games sprint 2 weeks later (and see if I can avoid the DFL this year). I'd like to find a tri that made sense to do before July and then make the solid decision (ie. sign up!) for something later in the season. No matter what I feel like I need to be following some kind of plan because I am flying a bit too much by the seat of my pants and maybe that is what did me in at the du.
In the end, I'm just doing a lot of thinking right now. I'm not in the best of head space so maybe I just need to sit on this for a little bit. Another week and maybe my head will be clearer. I tried to go on a walk/jog with Stacy last night. I wasn't up for much running though I keep up with her fast walk better than I used to. We did a couple miles, but it was more social than workout.